Montgomery in the Midst

Montgomery Day 3

The relationship line right under my pinky

About 15 years ago in New Hampshire my twin sister and I had a hand reading done by a friend.

She was excited to see the differences and similarities in the hands of twin sisters.

In a reading they often look at one hand, what you come into the world with, and another, what destiny you have created....

All of that is a bit foggy in my mind, but what is still crystal clear to both my twin sister and I is this: We each have a strong relationship line with two marks through the line and two marks that did not touch the same relationship line. The reader surmised that we may each have two children in our immediate family and that the two floating may be our twin sisters children.

As of January 24, 2015, the prophecy is complete. Montgomery William was born and he made the fourth line.  We each have two children with our husbands plus two more children that we love as our own.

As a labor support person I am used to meeting the laboring couple at the hospital and offer emotional and physical support through labor and delivery.

With my sister's labor I arrived 2 days before to be near her. Our 3 older children were two hours away in the loving hands of their grandparents (our parents). They experienced a pig barn filled with 500 piglets and rode their trikes in grandpa's basement for hours.

My sister and I did lovely things together that are nearly impossible with three little people in tow.  We went out to a slow dinner, with a tasting tray and courses, we cleaned and displayed heirloom china, and wandered through Michael's and Target choosing stickers and treats for our little valentines.

While walking the isles of Target my sisters breathing changed. We both knew it was time to go home and relax.  She turned on a chick flick and I made dinner for us and one for the freezer.  We relaxed, I stitched on the couch beside her, then retired to bed early, thinking we might be awoken in the night.

Labor:

I was awoken at 6 am Saturday morning.  She was pretty sure we would be going in soon.  We timed contractions, talked a lot about their intensity, and at about 9 am went to the hospital.

We were sent away after little progress. A little adventure followed, complete with a large meal in the hospital cafeteria, numb arms from carrying packed bags through many hallways, and several discussions of what we should do. We stayed close in case things progressed.  They did not, so we went home where everyone would be more comfortable.  We napped, chatted, repacked the hospital bag, stitched, and as evening came, labor resumed full force.  When my sisters sounds became guttural, we loaded into the car again.  This time arriving at the hospital within 1 1/2 hours of Montgomery's birth.

It was easy supporting my sister through labor.  We can communicate sometimes without words. I massaged the muscles that were aching, applied oils, and stepped away when she needed space.

Once labor was steady she had a quick, beautiful, unmedicated birth.

Mama and Baby

Labor support comes easy to me. I love doing it.

What I was not prepared for was the extreme emotion pouring from my heart and eyes when this little lad was born.

He was blue, the cord was wrapped once around his neck and intertwining around his body. He took his good old time to cry.

This is usually when a tear slips down my cheek and I hold the mother's hand while the father watches them weigh and assess the baby.

For little Montgomery I followed him, glancing over at my sister long enough to see if she was alright. She was in the care of the most gentle OB I have ever met.  My eyes were instantly back to my nephew. His Daddy and I were in an emotional trance.  The little guy was grunting instead of crying and they were pounding on his back and intentionally aggravating him to get the mucous out of him. His Oxygen and sugar levels were low. He overcame both and was finally placed back on his Mama's chest. The rosy color came to his skin, robust nursing was pursued, and peace came back into my heart.

I breathed again, deep lovely breaths filled with emotions.

Auntie Andrea with  Baby Montgomery

My sister was amazing.  After a very long labor, and an incredibly quick delivery, her body was in great shape for her recovery.

When the adrenaline wore off, I crashed on a cot close by. I awoke in the early hours to fall in love with my little nephew again. As I rocked him and gazed at his peaceful presence, I thought of how much I love this child. His big sister is dear to my heart. She can turn me to gush with a few words and test my patience just like my boys.  These two, my niece and nephew, will always be loved by me. I will treat them similar to my own.  My two boys will be blessed and loved by my sister in the same manner. 
It is imprinted on our hands.

We waited in Kentucky for Montgomery to come home from the hospital.  My boys were excited to meet their new cousin.  Joel and Aria have loved each other since their first meeting.  Henri is often the third wheel in their duo. We so hoped for Henri to have the same type of cousin bond. 

As soon as Montgomery was taken out of his car seat, my little guy Henri was on the couch ready to hold him and love him.  When Montgomery was placed in his arms, Henri said, " Hi buddy. Are you going to be my little friend?" Montgomery was peaceful and looked up at him and the bond of cousins began.

Henri and Montgomery

These two have loved each other since their first meeting

Cousins

What Andrea Creates

Hi. I'm Andrea, a mother, a wife, an educator, a maker, a gardener, and a birth support person.

My family enjoys discovering our local landscape and devouring delicious local food. I often cook and bake with alternative ingredients. 

I write about local experiences and recipe revelations on my blog.

I also create clothes, dolls, and wool animals that encourage imaginative play. I will be including some simple patterns here on my blog.

My background is in Horticulture, Waldorf Education (a type of education that's goal is to educate the whole child, head, heart and hands) Gardening, and Storytelling.

I have created and worked in a series of gardens over the country and many in my own back yard.

I enjoy incorporating my Waldorf training and teaching experience, my love of gardening, sewing, and baking, and my love for my children into our days.

Engaging children in meaningful activities can be rewarding and challenging. I like to share ideas that are enriching.

I would love for you to come along on our journey.

I write this blog for the same reason I create art, soft sculptures, and food. It enriches me. Doing something for myself is very important.  It is easy as a parent to go through the day's tasks of work obligations, feeding, transporting, and caring for others, without spending time for you.  When I create, be it a little knit chicken, a large crocheted rug, a blog post, or a simple lemon curd, good energy is created for myself.

Just the other morning I awoke early.  The house was quiet. I tiptoed over the creaky spot in the hall. I delicately reached for my coffee supplies to brew a pot undetected. After updating a few things, checking the weather, renewing an etsy listing, and peeking briefly at a favorite blog, the house remained quiet.

I looked below my desk.  There was a basket of items that did not sell at the Holiday Craft shows.  I intended to photograph them once the sunshine came in the window.  I picked up a kit of a rug hooked heart, found the right size embroidery hoop, and spent a half hour making a sweet little wool heart.

My boys awoke as I was pulling the last loops through to the surface.  I was happy, having created a little piece by myself in the early hours, alone.  I was able to greet my children, to be present with them, my time alone was done, but complete.

Doing things for myself helps me to be more present with others.

This is a little piece of who I am, why I continue to create whenever possible, and the juggle that must exist to do so.  

Thank you Dear Readers for coming along.

I welcome your comments, suggestions, and insight on this voyage.

Andrea's Education:

Associate degree in Horticulture.

BA in Education. Her Bachelor's thesis was titled “A Waldorf Garden Curriculum”.

M. Ed. in Waldorf Education.

Her Master's thesis was titled, “The Benefits of Teaching Mythology”.

Andrea has worked in two different Waldorf Schools, in gardens over the US, England and in her own backyard. She has no culinary training, but loves reading cookbooks and making nourishing home cooked food for her family.

I stole their bath.

Sometimes my husband needs to travel. We get into a bit of a different rhythm. Just a 3 year old, 5 year old, and their Mama. The transition to evening is a little different...

Tonight after dinner I set up a story silk with the Three Billy Goats Gruff.  They know the story well and asked to help act it out. They were the Billy goats. I was the troll. After the story they wanted to continue creating their own stories. We made their wood castle into a puppet theater and they created stories for some time.

I was able to pull them away  for a bedtime snack of applesauce and yogurt, but then they went right back to their play. I drew a bath and their play turned into a child going to school and saying goodbye to his mother. They traveled through bedroom doors sending each other off to school.
I said: "Your bath is ready! Please come to the back bath."
I was practically ignored.  The dialogue continued of sweet play between brothers (not always the case).

I remembered a post on Face book earlier by Elizabeth Gilbert. This quote was on her feed:

"and I said to my body, softly. 'I want to be your friend.' it took a long breath and replied, 'I have been waiting my whole life for this'" - Nyyirah Waheed

And as methodically as a wave crashes on the shore, I stole their bath!
I sunk into the water and let my whole body relax. I was kind to my body, to my friend.
About the time I choose to add steaming water to my bath I heard the blind go up and little guy exclaim,
"Good morning son! It is time to get ready for school".
Knowing my neighbors often take a nightly constitution directly out our bedroom window, I asked the boys to please close the bathroom door so I could get out of the bath.
The door was closed. My soak, my treat done.
I closed the blinds in my towel, put on my pjs and washed little boys faces and hands before crawling into bed.
They got ready quickly, because a new book from our favorite author was in my hands.

My Big Sister

There is no better friend than a sister.

My big sister and I have not always seen eye to eye.
It may have started at birth and been exacerbated when I shipped her things to the attic the moment she left for college to reside in my own room. It would be safe to say we spent some time stirring the pot.
My big sis said something very wise to me awhile back.
She said, "Andrea once I figured out that your going to do your thing and I'm going to do mine it was much easier just to accept each other for who we are". Or something to that effect.

Acceptance: Accepting who we are and accepting others. This may be the greatest task of siblings. The task of telling us when we are crass, full of ourselves, or when we need to take a risk.

A sibling can be your biggest cheerleader and your toughest critic at the same time.

My big sister has a unique power over me.
A simple joke from her lips can bring me to tears, as can a thoughtful gesture.

I care for her so fiercely that for a long time I hurt her by trying to change her point of view. I don't even remember about what we cared so much about. But that is not the point. The point is we were meant to be together on this path. Blessing each others journey.

Recently our childhood friends lost their sibling too young. The heartache reminds me not to take our time together for granted. I hold my sister longer when I see her and try to find time to check in with her more. Because she is a blessing.

My big sister has a big heart.
She loves fiercely. She reminds me so much of our stubborn grandmother at times.
Someone who will defend you no matter what and not care a spec of what others think.
She would also break through walls to protect an animal in need.
She is precise, on time, and meticulous about plans (something I am not).
She is a good friend to so many.

Thank you Dannette for being you!
Thank you for being a big sister to Dawn and I and all that it entails.

On your birthday, I wish you JOY!
Joy in your heart, in your space, in your understanding.
Blessings on your year!

Make a difference

While cleaning out 40 years worth of our families attic a few treasures were found.

This box of magnets given to me by a dear friend is one.

He was a fellow camper and then a fellow camp counselor with me when we were 18 years old.

He took the time to send a package of magnets that would have been waste and to write a beautiful letter telling me that I make a difference.

I know I read this letter 18 years ago and I was touched.  I was probably moving from one college to another and put it in the attic to use them when I had an idea.

Many things happen for a reason.  Timing amazes me.

Now, 18 years later, I needed to hear these words again.  I need to be inspired by my younger self and the friends I've made.

I've been thinking lately of the irony of this 36 year old (me) waiting tables with 21 years olds.  And it is for the same reason that this letter was rediscovered.  To remember the passion, conviction, and determination, of the age.  And to reclaim some of that.

So I chose to create.  I spent a lovely evening winding down after work with art supplies and Christmas Ale. And I now have lovely inspirational quotes for gifts.

In this time of Thanksgiving I am so Thankful to have the ability to reflect, to love, and with my own hands to create.

Music to my Ears

Sometimes I think I am intended to distill some of the *dogma surrounding Waldorf education. It is something I constantly do in my heart and mind. It makes my heart hurt when one aspect of the philosophy sends people on a different path. Yet, I find myself surging through these struggles often.

Music was something I took out of my life temporarily for the sake of my babies senses. We talk a great deal in Waldorf education about the world of tone. One of my research papers in my undergrad study was based on tone, the devachian tone, and the Essence of the music we experience as we sleep and while awake. 

I can truly say that I grew up believing I did not have a musical ear.  I was in the band in middle school but somehow as a young adult forgot to read music and lost the desire to sing my own tune. Then when I became a Waldorf teacher I taught myself to play the recorder and learned each song on it in order to sing to my class. My mentors were all musical and somehow I realized I could sing.  When I was completing my Waldorf teacher training I realized the afternoon singing and madrigals were some of my favorite times.  Right now I can think of our group held together in a beautiful room filled with our voices and it brings me great joy.

Somewhere in this discovery and joy I also took on a bit of the dogma.  Those ideas that somehow sneak in and we live with them without questioning.  So in the guide of protecting my babies senses I did not play other music.  Of course I would sing. Lullabies, nursery rhymes, little tunes I made up... But I did not play music for me, and rarely had the chance to sing with others.

On a particularly difficult 2 hour drive with two littles I turned on ENYA. Everyone was quiet, joyful, peaceful. They loved the ethereal music filling the car.

There was a little whisper in my unconscious: joy. Joy by music alone.

Weeks passed maybe months...

I was given a Bluetooth speaker which amplifies Pandora beautifully.

And all of a sudden impromptu dance parties evolved in our kitchen. Dinner preparation and clean up became more joyful. A transitional mood changer was reborn in our lives.

Such joy that could have gone undiscovered.

To be honest: I've always loved femle folk. The culmination of lyrics of love and deep womanly tone brings joy to my heart.

And when Mama is Happy : 

Everyone is Happy.

*From Wiki:

Dogma is a principle or set of principles laid down by an authority as incontrovertibly true.^[1] It serves as part of the primary basis of an ideology or belief system, and it cannot be changed or discarded without affecting the very system's paradigm, or the ideology itself. The term can refer to acceptable opinions of philosophers or philosophical schools, public decrees, religion, or issued decisions of political authorities.^[2]

And sometimes the boys take apart the couch while I listen to music in the kitchen!

Wide open spaces

Wide open spaces are so important.

When we are having a rough day we sometimes "escape" to an outdoor space.

It is amazing to me how our moods are lightened by the air, beauty, and sky that surround us.

I was just talking to a friend the other day about how much we are outside. I feel off schedule if we have less than 2 hours outside a day. Usually it is spent playing freely, building, caring for our animals or exploring.  At the very least (in really cold weather) we go out for a half an hour in the morning and again in afternoon.  But often we find a place that we love and spend an hour or more exploring it.

Our favorite open spaces in order of pictures:

Downtown Kent along the river

The Akron Zoo

Chase park in Kent

The Tree park in Hudson

Our Back yard

Beckwith Orchard

The fox den (the woods a short walk from our house)

The Green at 1st and Main in Hudson

Our neighborhood